Driving from the Passenger's Seat

My wife insists that driving from the passenger seat of the car is the proper role for a wife. This way she can concentrate on the important things: the mistakes I make. She can do this without having to be bothered with things like paying attention to her own business.

Amen, brother! Preach on!

There are a few things that are particularly distressing to me regarding this. Can a person really overcome the predilection of wincing when the person next to you is making the sucking/hissing sound that proclaims peril is near? I am fairly certain that this is genetic, prehistoric or something like that. Will this lead to a creation/evolution debate? Also doesn't a person already feel they are completely inept when, absent-mindedly and completely innocently, they miss the turn everyone is diligently looking for? Does it really need to be pointed out? And why is it that I realize I missed the turn twelve seconds after her, and two seconds before she starts to point it out? Is this bane or blessing? Feels like bane to me; blessing to her.

What really burns me up is that just when I need her to say something, she'll clam up and I'll get into an accident, or get pulled over or something! Then she'll use that to justify future passenger-seat driving!

On the same subject did you happen to notice that from the passenger seat objects appear closer than they are? Definitely true, for the hissing/sucking sound is most profoundly utilized when danger is four or five blocks away.

I hope you do not misunderstand me. This becomes a source of entertainment. My wife realized the peril that she is reacting to is really non-existent, and after the sucking/hissing sound has dissipated she sheepishly says, "Sorry." Whereupon I smile and say, "That's O.K." Big of me, huh?

Life is grand. It is indeed.